A Letter of Love to My Sweet Son

Dear Matthew,

As impossible as it is to believe, you are six months old today.  A friend once said about the passage of time that the days may drag on, but the years fly by, and I’m finding that to be so painfully true.We had some truly difficult times in those early months, days where we both cried too often, but we are now finding our rhythm and I am grateful for each moment that I have with you.  I look at you now and cannot believe that we had such a rough beginning.

Since you were finally diagnosed with and treated for acid reflux, you are a remarkably different baby.  Gone are the days of incessant crying, shrieking, back arching, and vomiting.  You now smile, you play, you sleep, and you hug.  I am sorry that it took us so long to find you some relief, my sweet boy.

You now sit independently and your huge, toothless grin shows just how proud of yourself you are.  You light up when Katie comes near and you can’t get enough of her hugs and kisses.  You are also trying desperately to figure out how to crawl and if I’m honest, I hope you wait a bit.

There are several small and precious moments in the day when it is just the two of us and I find myself staring at you in awe.  I can’t believe my good fortune to have you as my son.

I look into your beautiful baby eyes and I wonder how you see me.  Do you see how saddened I am that we had such a rough start?   Do you see how I smile at the mere sight of you? Can you possibly even begin to imagine just how much I adore you?

I touch your cute little ears and I wonder why it is that you love my singing.  (You are truly the only one who does.)

I look at your sweet mouth and eagerly await the sound of you calling out my name.  The sound of your laughter brightens my days, sweet boy.

I hold your tiny baby hands and find it impossible to imagine that one day your hand will dwarf mine.  I am so grateful for your touch, the way you rub my face in the sweetest way, as though you are trying to tell me something important.

I tickle your chubby little legs and hope that you have them for a while, since you are our last baby and I can’t bear the thought of you growing.

I look at your tiny feet and yummy baby toes and can’t believe just how perfect you are.

You are a joy, Matthew.  You are delicious and happy and above all, you are a true blessing.

I love you,

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12 responses to “A Letter of Love to My Sweet Son

  1. Jessica Holt

    Wow! How powerfull of a letter to your sweet baby boy… you honestly brought tears to my eyes. I can relate 100% to the way you feel as a mother, Nichole. Love you guys lots!!!!

  2. Nancy MacDonald

    What a delight to see a picture of Matthew smiling! (Though it makes it seem as if he’s changed overnight.) I loved reading this letter to Matthew. Phrases that stand out to me are, “I wonder how you see me” and “yummy baby toes” and “one day your hand will dwarf mine.” You capture the precious moments, Nichole, and you will them to endure. Thank you so much for sharing with the rest of us!

    • He is so much happier now and smiles constantly. Poor little guy had such a rough go of it at first.
      Thank you for sharing your favorite parts of the post, Nancy, that means the world to me. I can’t tell you how much it means to me that you stop by.
      Huge hugs, Nichole

  3. Matthew is breathtaking. I can’t possibly tell you how happy I am that you’ve found your way, that he is comfortable and happy. Soak up every joyful moment.

  4. That is so sweet. My little guy had acid reflux as well. I felt the same way–that he was in pain and I didn’t know it! 🙂 They are both great now.

    • Acid reflux is just a terrible thing for a baby to go through. Our doctor kept telling us that he didn’t think Matthew had it, but we saw a specialist who confirmed it for us. Since starting him on Prilosec, our life has completely changed. Thank goodness!
      Thanks for stopping by and for commenting! 🙂

  5. Janelle

    I loved the “yummy baby toes”, “I wonder how you see me”, and “one day your hand will dwarf mine”, as well. Such beautiful comments that show so much of your love to him. Your letters are precious. You sure know how to delight in your children…thank you for sharing with the rest of us; you remind and encourage us (well certainly me!) to stop, look, and listen to our own lives/kids.

    • As challenging as being a mom is, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

      And who are you kidding that I remind YOU to stop, look, and listen?! Good grief, you could write an entire book on how to squeeze every bit of joy out of each day. YOU are the inspiration and your beautiful children are a testament to your ability to do so.

  6. How awesome is your son? He is breathtaking.

    And you? You are pretty awesome as well.

    What a lovely lovely letter.

    • Thank you for your kind words on the letter. These kids make me sappy.

      Also? Thank you for the compliment on the baby. He is pretty darn cute. Even at 1am, 3am, and 5am…

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